Top Ten Names Of People I Have Met In Schools

1. Awesome
2. Brilliant
3. Seven
4. Chance
5. Lucky
6. Venus
7. Chandaleah
8. April, May and June ( 3 sisters)
9. Star
10.Turnip Head

( All these are real names of real people that i have met in schools, well apart from the last one. i made that one up )

The Day When A Poem Flew In The Window

This poem just appeared a couple of night ago. It kind of flew in the window and said hello!! I wrote in in the same length of time that it takes you to read it. Wish they were all like that. Its called My Bed Is Like A Boat.

My Bed is like a little boat
sailing on the sea
I share a pair of bunkbeds
with my brother and me
I have a crew of cuddly toys
to keep me company
as I sail my little bedboat
across the sleepy sea

We drift across the ocean
to where the waters deep
then cast away the anchor
and sail a ship called sleep

That Mysterious Web Bloke

Imagine this....there is a bloke somewhere in Thailand called Andy. He is wearing a silly hat to cover his even sillier hair style and he is sat a computor right now. The room he is sat in is dark and warm. Outside big crickets churp in the long grass. Sweat slowly drips down Andys neck. Lets face it, its not going to drip up his neck is it?? Andy is a computor genius. He could take over the world if he really wanted to. That would be easy peasy lemon squeezy. He wants to fly home, back to England but a massive cloud of volcanic ash won't let him. So, to kill time he does something amazing. He gets hold of my website and gives it a good shake. Andy is the man who does my website for me. He works under cover of the night and no-one really knows who he is or where is is. All we know is that people call him Andy and he likes Hobnobs. But he is a website expert, just look at this gallery thingy that he has done. Its over there to your right. Yeah, thats it. Cool or what.

A Donkey called Simon

Yesterday i had a great day at the Scarborough Literature Festival. Hipee, a day at the seaside. The festival is a good one with loads of writers coming along, all talking about books and reading and turnips. Well, not sure about turnips but you know what i mean. My event was called Wacky Words and it was a lot of fun. BIG LAFFARAMA!! You never know what you are going to get in library land. I once did an event in a library to three people and a dog!! I not sure about the people but the dog liked it. Scarborough though was a good one but the sea was cold. My sons Ben and Jack came. They had a donkey ride. Jacks donkey was called Simon. They had a paddle and both said they had feet like ice. Quick joke to finish - what do donkeys have for dinner? They have half an hour like everyone else.

Its ok i'll stop now.

Its the Easter break. Here are the TOP FIVE THINGS THAT HAVE GONE ON in the Easter hols.

1. My son Ben ate a real life oyster!!!He didn't want to at first but he took a deep breath, went a bit gaga for a while and just did it!!! He said it was lemony and chewy.
2. Bens bro Jack wants to be a train driver. I asked him how he would know where to go and he said that he would just follow the tracks. Of course he would.
3. I walked 9 miles from Dewsbury to where i live in Huddersfield because i thought it was a good idea. Here's how it felt - 1 mile Ok, 2 miles Ok, 3 miles kind of Ok, 4 miles say what!!, 5 miles Ow, 6 miles hang on a minute, 7 miles nearly there, 8 miles sore feet, 9 miles big cup of tea.
4. Jackie did lots of shopping. Then the day after she did a bit more.
5. I cut the grass, planted some flowers, went for a day out, had a curry, played cricket with a football and got an iPod.

Wow. When the holidays finish i might get a break!!

There Is A Bloke Drilling Somewhere

There is a bloke drilling somewhere. I am in my room at my house where i do all my writing. Well, i do lots of writing on trains, buses and in pubs, er i mean cafes and all that but i always write them on to my computor in my room or as i call it The Imagination Station. Well today there is a bloke drilling somewhere and it sounds like the drill is in my head. I don't know what he's doing. Sounds like he is drilling to the centre of the Earth. What does a big drill sound like?? A dinosaur snoring? A mythical beast on the loo? I reckon if i wrote a poem today it would sounds like this AAAAGGGGHHHHHHGGGRRRRBBBBKKKLLPPP or something like that. Acually, thats not too bad. Maybe one of the best poems that i've ever written. Maybe write your own drill poems. Heres another kakakakakakakakakakakaka. Hey i'm getting good at this.